Sounds about right
Printed From: rsvr.net Forums
Category: General Chat
Forum Name: Jokes
Forum Description: Keep it clean-ish people! Will be moderated :)
URL: http://www.rsvr.net/forum_posts.asp?TID=27402
Printed Date: 26 Mar 2026 at 22:46
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 12.07 - https://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: Sounds about right
Posted By: IanG
Subject: Sounds about right
Date Posted: 17 Dec 2018 at 18:47
|
Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in the economy, the Government has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and above on early, mandatory retirement, thus creating jobs and reducing unemployment. This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early). Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to the Government to be considered for the SHAFT program (Special Help After forced Termination). Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early Workers). A person may be RAPED once,SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as the Government deems appropriate. Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance). Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by the Government. Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much sh*t (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. The Government has always prided themselves on the amount of sh*t they give our citizens. Should you feel that you do not receive enough sh*t, please bring this to the attention of your Local MP who has been trained to give you all the sh*t you can handle. Sincerely, The Committee for Economic Value of Individual Lives (E.V.I.L.) PS - Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions,plus of course Brexit. The Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off. ------------- www.apworkshops.co.uk www.apriliaforum.co.uk www.apriliaownersclub.co.uk Looking forward to the next track day |
Replies:
Posted By: legend88
Date Posted: 17 Dec 2018 at 18:55
|
Posted By: constant
Date Posted: 17 Dec 2018 at 19:18
| i think they must of implemented most of that without telling us very funny though |
Posted By: cwp
Date Posted: 17 Dec 2018 at 19:20
|
😂 ------------- born ugly what's your excuse!! |