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Reckless
Moto3 racer Joined: 02 Jan 2018 Location: South Yorkshire Status: Offline Points: 10 |
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Posted: 04 Jan 2018 at 08:26 |
I'll never ring the enema help line again, the were very rude to me
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Roger Ramjet
Premium Member Joined: 24 Jun 2014 Status: Offline Points: 162 |
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My wife... its difficult to say what she does... she sells seashells on the seashore.
I use to think sticks and stones could break my bones but words can never hurt me...until I fell into a printing press. As a child I had a medical condition that meant I had to eat soil three times a day in order to survive...lucky my older brother told me about it really. When I was in America, I really got into the culture, I went into the shop and the guy said "Have a nice day" and I didn't...so I sued him. My grandfather invented the cold air balloon... But it never really took off. About a month before he died we covered my Granfather's back full of lard .... after that he went downhill very quickly. ......................I'll get my coat............
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albrown001
Premium Member Joined: 08 May 2013 Location: Dorset Status: Offline Points: 525 |
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Horse walks in to a bar
Bar man says, why the long face? Horse gets pissed. Falls over. Bar man says, hey don’t leave that lying there It’s not a lion. It’s a horse 🐎 |
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cwp
Moto GP Alien Joined: 03 Feb 2014 Location: mid wales Status: Offline Points: 1688 |
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born ugly what's your excuse!!
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cwp
Moto GP Alien Joined: 03 Feb 2014 Location: mid wales Status: Offline Points: 1688 |
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born ugly what's your excuse!!
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Andy Higham
Premium Member Joined: 21 Feb 2017 Location: bolton Status: Offline Points: 167 |
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My apprentice is about as much use as a carpet fitters ladder
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redratbike
Moderator Group The Collector Messiah Joined: 07 May 2008 Status: Offline Points: 16146 |
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www.apriliaperformance.co.uk www.apriliaforum.co.uk www.apriliaownersclub.co.uk |
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Diablo
Premium Member Joined: 29 Sep 2010 Location: Upwell Status: Offline Points: 3126 |
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I'm not saying the mother in law's fat, but when she sits around the house, she sits AROUND the house... biddum tish... no wait there's more..What's brown and sticky?.. A stick!..biddum tish, I thank you...I hope to die peacefully in my sleep, like my Grandpa... not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.. biddum tish...Doctor doctor is it ok to have children after 35?.... No, 35 children is enough... Bought some camouflage trousers the other day, but I can't find them... biddum tish... Why did the golfer wear 3 pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one...Knock Knock.."Whose there"? "Fred".."Fred who"?... "Burt Lancaster".. biddum tish..I once farted in an elevator, it was wrong on so many levels
The only other ones I know are rude. I think Tim Vine is the master of one liners. |
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Question everything.
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cwp
Moto GP Alien Joined: 03 Feb 2014 Location: mid wales Status: Offline Points: 1688 |
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😂
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born ugly what's your excuse!!
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Careca
World Superbike Star Joined: 30 Dec 2015 Location: Sevenoaks Status: Offline Points: 269 |
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I heard a rumor that they were giving away manure at my local farm , so i went down there to check ; it was bullsh*t.
The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran . My hobby is collecting empty bottles , which sounds so much better than alcoholic .
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